- me half the time: i'm so insecure and so ugly ew
- me the other half the time: i'm flawless don't touch me peasant
Yesterday I was literally laying in bed for like two hours trying to fall asleep because I couldn’t stop thinking. But within those two hours, I realized that God really does answer our prayers. I remember that after my grandpa died I constantly prayed that my grandpa would be in Heaven and to just give me the assurance that he did enter Heaven.
The reason why I was so skeptical or doubtful that he might have not entered Heaven was that as my grandpa’s body was slowly dying, his faith followed.
But after months of praying, I had a dream. The dream was I was walking to his room after he died to reminiscence but my grandpa was there sitting on his favorite chair. So I was like, “Granpda! Why are you here and not in Heaven?!” And he said, “I wanted to say one last goodbye before I go back to Heaven.” And I was like “u silly boy. hurry up and go back up there.” Just kidding I didn’t really say that but after he said he was going to go back to Heaven, a light shone through and he peacefully flew up.
I don’t think I’ll ever forget that dream. And how much I needed that dream to FINALLY have peace in my heart.
And I was just thinking about this last night and got a widdle teary. Not because I was sad, but because I was so happy that my grandpa can be with the Lord and run around and eat what ever he wants and do whatever that he couldn’t do in this filthy world.
This will be my emotional feeling for the rest of the year. I hate being emotional.